Therapy for Trauma and Betrayals of Trust
Helping you find clarity, hope and healing, whether you’ve been hurt or hurt someone you love
You might be considering therapy for trauma or a betrayal of trust because…
You have had a traumatic experience whether recent or long ago and you long to be free of the pain that floods your body when reminded.
You recently discovered your partner has had or is having an affair whether physical or otherwise. Your head is spinning, heart is breaking, and you don’t know what to do.
You have betrayed the trust of someone you love and you’re feeling overwhelmed by regret, guilt, remorse, sorrow, and shame. You don’t understand how you got here and don’t know how to respond to your partner’s pain and anger. You want to make things better, yet nothing seems to help.
The pain, shame and despair are overwhelming. You are finding it hard to eat, sleep, and quiet your mind.
There is pressure from others or within to end the relationship, but you aren’t sure if that is the right decision for you. You want to see if it is possible to repair and rebuild. You feel the heaviness of the moment and don’t know what to do.
If you hurt someone you love, you might not have the support of family and friends that you need to make sense of what’s happened and to find the answers you and your partner need to heal. You might not believe you deserve compassion, reassurance, empathy, acceptance, and healing. You do!
You may be in couple’s counseling and want the added support of individual counseling to get back on solid ground and enhance your quest for understanding and wholeness.
The future seems unclear. There are sleepless nights worrying about what your life will look like when the dust settles. You are facing a hardship so big it’s hard to imagine feeling whole and connected again.
Maybe you have decided to end the relationship and you want help as you move in that direction.
This is a devastating time in your life. You need and deserve support to navigate this season of distress. Read on to see if my services might help you.
There are many avenues to relationship betrayal…infidelity is only one
Trust, security and safety are threatened by many types of hurts. One highly recognized type of betrayal is through a crossing of agreed upon emotional or sexual boundaries. This may look like flirting, hidden attractions, secret sexual activity or emotional connections.
*Other forms of betrayal can be experienced through repeated patterns of 1) dishonesty, omissions, or broken promises, 2) leaving or threatening to leave when times are bad, 3) talking poorly about your partner to others, 4) lack of fairness in how finances, resources and labor are divided, 5) lack of sexual interest and physical intimacy, 6) disrespect, ridicule, or sarcasm, 7) unresponsive, cold, disinterested or unaffectionate interactions, or 8) emotional or physical abuse.
*Adapted from The Science of Trust, John M. Gottman, PhD
Safely navigate this season wherever your journey may lead.
Experiencing a trauma or finding out about an infidelity can trigger a crisis and create a deep wound. The aftermath can feel chaotic and out of control as you cope with intense negative feelings. Whatever your situation, there is hope for healing.
Through education and evidence-based therapy, I will help you make sense of your experience and cope with the intense, negative emotions. We will consider the impact of the trauma or betrayal on your sense of safety and security as you gain clarity about the future.
We will examine the message of the hurtful experience and figure out what it says about you, others, and the world. Why did this happen? How could I have done this? Where do we go from here?
Together we will explore what was lost and determine a path toward understanding, wholeness, growth and forgiveness.
Throughout our work together, I will collaborate with you on your care to best align with your goals and desired outcome. Engagement, compassion, and acceptance are foundational to my beliefs about how people change and create fulfilling, resilient lives.